hahahahaha. gawd. i love disney. i love disney!!! I LOVE DISNEY~!
ok... so like, update shall we?!
woke up.. and took the train to b's!
was VERY very sleepy..
so we slept ^_^ v
ate mi goreng.. ~ and then tammy went to work!
was quiet at work...
SIGH* such a pain in the butt. when you're super tired, and you still have to manage
to pull a smile to impress customers T_T....... not cool!
after.. went to tommy's
lol, everyone was just drinking..... and throwing cheezos at each other. lovely.
stayed for the cake then went home

*

"Friendship is a slippery notion. We lose friends as we change and our friends don't, or as we form other alliances, or as we betray our friends or are ourselves betrayed. We often make friends for the weakest of reasons - proximity, for example, or shared experiences, or laziness or need - but what will make them endure as friends? Their similarity to us? Their utter difference from us?" -TDW

how do i start this rant? because there is TONNES of things i want to say.. but the trouble is, working out how to fit it all in.

at first, i thought.. yea - it's probably going to be a big loss in my life. until JV pointed out to me, "do you really need them in your life?" .. so i reflected, on the good(if there were any) and the bad times. i realise, you were a bad influence on me. and it's not only my own self's realisation... but also the ones around me. it was like, you showed me a side of myself.. which was so naive, so innocent, so superficial - to everything i really am.

change is inevitable. but now, it is myself who has changed - not you. and i'm proud of this change. i don't need to fit in, i don't need to be a sheep.. and follow what ever it is that you do. i don't need to get myself into a muddle... creating a mask to show a side of me, which isn't me in the first place. i don't need fake happiness.

i don't care if we are never friends again, or if we ever become acquaintances in the near future. you are, and always will be, as stubborn as you are - and it's not a positive thing either. if you never step down from that pedal stool you put yourself up on, and start realising the importance of those around you - then you will never know what it means to have real friends. those you can rely on truly - those who you set apart from your superficial friends. you don't know what it means to apologise, you don't know what it means to accept an apology, you have too much pride and this is all because you are plain spoilt. grow up - start learning.

*

as each day approaches to an end, i feel as though.. i learn so much about myself. i can truthfully say, i feel secure. i feel secure within myself, because i've found myself. i've found the real me. the real tammy - that splurts out whatever's on her mind. the real tammy - that thinks so much, and it simply feels okay to think a lot. the real tammy - that finds the pleasures in the little things in life. blinded by many incidents and people, going through different experiences... finally let me find the real tammy - and thank god i found her. (okay... i feel so fob right now)

and this self identity.. doesn't stop growing. because now i've found a companion... who understands me so well. who not only sees the good in me, but brings out the best in me. at the same time, he cares for me and looks after my wellbeing.. he makes me part of his life - centre of his attention. at times (because i'm such a bitch) i find it hard to tell him.. how much he means to me. his impact is so great.. that every little thing he says - matters.

thank you for being so different, so unique..
thank you for coming into my life
because you, too, have coloured my world.

currently listening to: MULAN(DiSNEY!!) - I'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU