helloo there my friend!

i'm back i'm back i'm back!
well, its been quite some time since my exams.. and i've actually completed SOME things, not a lot:

- clean my room
- apply for RSA
- furniture shopping
- facebook (yes that's a new one for me!)
- xanga (xanga.com/cup_of_milo... sadly, i will be leaving xanga as .. i have become to used to the simplicity of blogspot that i no longer remember how to use xanga. creds to emily for finding name!)
- watch way too much tv

it's good to not have any worries for the time being.. but at the same time, i can't help but feel a little uneasy. holidays are a good time to relax.. but at the same time, i am doing absolutely nothing. i've starting to see how materialistic people can be.. esp some of those around me, it seems their materialism has indeed enlarged - a level i never thought i would see.

within myself, i know i want a lot. i want to be more.. infact, i want to be in a place which will inspire me to do more.. but this lazing around is getting me no where but poorer, and less places to go to. quite monotomous

at the same time, my social life does seem quite a handful. infact - i'm not really sure how to handle it. i'm caught in between two set of minds. one, i would think.. it is a good time to let myself free a little, renew friendships and experience some years that i most likely won't be able to take back. however, i feel that i have placed a limitation on myself. in fact, i've placed this on myself for the whole year - and it doens't feel safe enough for me to break free from it.

i'm not quite sure what to do.