strength
strength
strength
strength
strength

i always find myself writing about friends, family, partners
relationships in general

lately i've been contemplating on how important friends are to me
what they mean to me.
hahahaa
well? i really don't know!
they don't seem to have the same affect on me as they used to
i've learnt a fair bit these holidays
and just has emily has pinpointed...
there are people in your life, who were once very important
but in a quick flash... people change, circumstances change
they're not going to stay in your life forever
and sometimes, you don't really want to work towards what you "used to be" anymore
because the differences..... have drawn the friendship too far apart.
*wow, this lil paragraph has taken approx. 1 week to think of how to word this stupid @#$#@$#. finally... wooooooo!*

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHH
i just really want school to start again
to see the familiar faces,
to laugh over spastic things again
to get on with the year already!!
because i'm getting bored out of my brains~

i always find myself writing about friends, family, partners
relationships in general

lately i've been contemplating on friends
what they mean to me, how important they are too me
hahahaa
i really don't know! they don't seem to have the same affect on me as they used to
i've learnt a fair bit these holidays
and just has emily has pinpointed...
there are people in your life, who were once very important
but in a quick flash... people change, circumstances change
they're not going to stay in your life forever
and sometimes, you don't really want to work towards what you "used to be" anymore
because the differences..... have drawn the friendship too far apart.
<<>>

SIGHHHHHHHHHHHH
i just really want school to start again
to see the familiar faces,
to laugh over spastic things again
to get on with the year already!!
because i'm getting bored out of my brains~

come back already

i miss u....... SIGH

miss you already

(L)

a few thoughts..

a lot of guys.. fail to understand a girls
that is, because they're not as broad minded as girls
girls.. infact, are quite easy to understand
girls don't ask questions for no reason
no.. girls as questions, because they seek a particular answer
to feel a certain way..
whether it is loved, noticed, appreciated...
yep. you get the drift.

watched juno today
and she questioned
if it was actually possible, to live happily ever after?
hmmm... i wonder how those couples who live old together do it..
really.
love is always changing
the levels of love is always changing
love is imperfect like that.
love changes, because people change
and people change... at different times
HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM?

*

waiting for a phone call
gosh..... i hate waiting V_V

i know it's quite a naive way of thinking
i understand it's quite childish
but just let this moment last for a bit longer.. please?
let me soak in this happiness for a bit longer
don't take it away from me
just yet.

ah -
proving a point
doesn't necessarily mean you have to use words

blogging this late is the best
esp when you're in a good mood
ah..... the peace.

so.. went to bb's house today, again lol....
vicky has pulled out a few seams off my dress..
AND I WAS TRYING SO HARD TO PROTECT MYSELF!
hmmmmm! ya, lovely lunch
and then matrix reloaded.....! was funfunfun! i love my bb~

the other day was judgement day with the parents...
hmmmm..... thinking about it freaks me out
everything is very VERY serious now
but at the same time, it's a good feeling
b/c he wants me to know his family/his family know me
i think i kinda knew what was expected of me.... so, i can't say i didn't try
but yes.... if they like me, they like me
and if they don't .. well, i have flaws - but that doesn't stop me from running my race

*

tonight went to elms...
thought it was going to be crap.... but it didn't turn out that bad.
saw people i haven't seen in.... a year hHAHA
and it's lovely that this best friend reminds me, and bugs me about being friends with her..
hmmm i'm trying to uncover the truth
well, the thing is... i suppose, i wouldn't mind being your friend again
i really wouldn't
but at the same time, i know you brought out the worse in me
and if i was to choose, i'd rather go my own path
maybe you could have the same, or less effect on me
but i'd rather not, i love me for me.........
and i don't want it to change.

there are a few types of people in this world:

case #1: shy and dangerous
this is the type where you are like a pip-squeak mouse.. but when you open this mouse's brain... dude. it's like a continuous working machine. these people .. yeah, they are quite philosophical, then again - who can't be with good english?

case #2: cocky, full stop
omlord. don't we have quite a few roaming around these days. those that are all talk, and then behind their backs.. people are just bagging the crap out of them. these people are so cocky and have too much ego boost in them to blow up the whole world. these people are quite simple minded... in fact, they don't really think before they speak at all.

case #3: the bluffers
man..these people are just smart at life. ok not smart at life, but a+ students when it comes to people-people skills. they know how to read people, manipulate people.. and become the dominant one.. in a very subtle way. they know the 411 to tell, fabricate lies. oh man.. if you're smart, and you know how to lie - you've succeeded a great deal in life.

case #4: cocky .. but allowed to be
you see, this is diff from case #2.. because these people have achieved a lot, and because they have.. well, they are given the grant to be cocky. lol........ lol @ these people. they can bite your ass so easily. they can prove a point easily.

case #5: not-so-bright
the not so bright actually comes in different category. the truth is.. everyone, is a not-so-bright case. technically speaking EVERYONE starts off as a not-so-bright crayon... everyone has been in this position. where you're naive, vulnerable and lost.

ok, i'm sick of blogging.

i feel quite useless
how come everyone makes it sound so logical
yet i can't get my head around it?

HA-HA
i just wrote
a long assed
deep emotional blog
but in the end, i didn't need it
she just needs a lil' bitta faith.
GEORGE DO,
thank you for all that you are
at times i forget how important you are to me
you are one of a kind <3

*
on a different note:
what the fuck is wrong with u.
what in the world are you thinking?
how can you be so.. what's that term? cheap?
how can you not give yourself some dignity?
how can you just let yourself go like that?
i don't really know if i should step in
because that would mean i'm sticking my head into some business
that would cause a lot of trouble.
but grow up.
there are better ways to give yourself more self esteem
to give yourself more ego
but it is definitely,
not through alcohol and "taking advantage of the situation"

rants are good.

sigh. never mind.

T_T"

thoughts are just

messing

around

in

my head.

at some point in your life, you learn how to
"sacrifice for the greater good"
like... will smith did in I AM LEGEND.. supposedly 'listening to God'
(sorry, but God never told you to act like Jesus and DIE FOR OTHERS, repentance doesn't come in that way!)

so let's not make it sound TOO heroic
in the end
understanding that you're actions DO matter to people
understanding that YOU have the ability to make people smile
and if you'd do anything for that smile?
then sacrificing isn't a big loss after all.

*

like VCE..
you only get out, what you put in.
friendships only change, because people change the amount of effort they put in.
i'm sorry
no reasons, no excuses...
bffl <3>

i'm not going to lie

because i really am upset.

okay....
so today, went to bb's friends house!
twas dumpling party '08!
"what do you do at dumpling parties?"
"err.. you eat dumplings, duh."
well.. more of lamb SK + dumplings
MASS FOOD, MASS SICK FEELING..........
b/c i am, quite full
yes, the guys are very funny...!

umm... yes, so we also watched I AM LEGEND
.. err.. LOL
not the greatest movie in the world..
quite.... painful, actually. lol - i forgive you..
and my mum just came and gave me a kiss.. in the ear
resulting to a partially deaf ear now.
i'm on the verge of swearing.

*

so i haven't written down any new year's resolution
because..... i don't know what's ahead for me
so...... this year's would have to be..
making an effort
to have no regrets.
NO REGRETS.

righteo, i'm not in a writing mood.. so this will do
peaaaaaaaace!

sometimes....
you want someone to understand you
but you'll find..
these answers are not found in others
only within yourself.

*

i miss..
just sitting there.
watching, listening..
i feel like going to the piano shop. ha.

LATTIMORE KENNY - FOR YOU

For you I give a lifetime of stability
Anything you want of me, nothing is impossible
For you, there are no words or ways to show my love
Or all the thoughts I'm thinking of
Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one,
I've made a change
Everything I do now, makes sense
All roads end, all I do is for you

For you I share the cup of love that overflows
And anyone who knows us knows
I would change all faults I have,
For you there is no low or high or in between
Of my heart that you haven't seen
Cause I share all I have and am
Nothing I've said's hard to understand
All I feel I feel deeper still, and always will
All this love is for you

Every note that I play, every word I might say
Every melody I feel
Are only for you and your appeal
Every page that I write, every day of my life
Would not be filled with without the things
That my love for you now brings
For you I make the promise of fidelity
Now and for eternity
No one could replace this vow

For you, I'd take take your hand heart And everything
And add to them a wedding ring
Cause this life is no good alone
Since we've become one you're all I've known
And if this feeling should leave, I'd die
And here's why, all I am is for you
Everything i do now makes sense
All roads end, all I do,
Is for you

*

i was going to write a blog
but i don't think i can express it anymore.
but, during this "thinking" time,
i rmbered a blog miriam wrote:

FRIENDS 2007:
I don't believe the friends we have now, are all that we will receive.
I don't believe the people around us we'll be with us every step of the way.
But the memories remain, I suppose. And it's these moments that I, for one, live for.
So cheers to us, mates of mine for making it this far.
Since I know... In a few years time, we won't even hear from each other anymore.
I'll miss you.

Don't fret if things don't turn out right. Or you can't find someone. Love never ends, in people it does, because people change. And change is inevitable. But when your relationship ends.. Don't let it take over you, accept it for what it is, call it what it is. But don't forget, never forget. A persons name is their gold and the currency to anyone's hospitality. Appreciate it, and remember that nonetheless, you're more experienced. And ultimately one step closer to finding what you want, what you need.

yep, miriam is superwoman
still 'til today, i find inspiration in her.
(L) if you're reading this you retard
i don't think i could have put it in better words myself

happy new years

.. okay, let me say that again.

happy 2008.

yep.......... i'm done.